Untitled Love

Lonely heart, so tepid. 

Life path completely astray.

Getting colder, melting away, 

icing over with each darkening day.

Where am I going, where the FUCK have I gone? Now I'm on this whole endless journey feeling overcrowded, yet alone.  

When things kept getting darker & lonelier, I ended up cutting ties, but still chained to this emptiness, living each day with wiped tears, fake smiles & uh huhs ...

My past is latching on to me, my future won't even look.

My heart is between a rock and a hard place, feeling completely shook.

Untitled Love, 

Undefined reasons,

Unbridled Passion, 

Locked up tight in a prison so maddening.

Over-shadowed long enough,  

Too many Secrets through the seasons,

Channeling Pain through my artwork in fashion, 

Hurling my feelings into onto the canvas as they're happening.

My past is latching on to me, my future won't even look.

My heart is between a rock and a hard place, feeling completely shook.

Untitled Love, 

Undefined reasons,

Unbridled Passion, 

Locked up tight in a prison so maddening.

Lonely heart, so tepid. 

Life path completely astray.

Getting colder, melting away, icing over in each darkening day.

long enough to see the rainbow 2

 Long Enough to See the Rainbow

by Daynah T. Pedersen

@sparklep8nter #sparklep8nter #sparklep8nterpoem

written & published 3-21-21 

It's always nice to have those friends when you giggle half the night, go clubbing or dancing, just feeling alright.

things are great, you're chill, you're my GIRL!

The friends that always want to pick you up in their car, 

blast the tunes on the radio, sometimes no plans at all.

But are they still when things change in your world?

when things get tough, when you're hurt, or sad, are they still your girl? 

are they only there when the weather is fair?

they want to only have fun, but when you can't or don't feel it

 no one wants to listen to your problems, no one wants to hear it.

no one wants to be there. so look a what you're stuck in...

so to have someone listen, you shell out your cash, sure therapy is great, 

but what about a friend, a real bond, is that all fake?

all the therapy in the world doesn't give you a real connection, 

all it gives you is anxiety till your next session.

all you want is someone true, someone you can cry to as well as laugh. 

but the second they see your cloud roll in, they say for forget this empath.

yeah, I can feel you backing away, I feel your toxic positivity pulsing through my veins. 

sorry, I can't always be fake happy like you, 

sorry I had a bad day and needed a minute or two.

sorry I even thought this was real, 

sorry I had other emotions to feel.

sorry, that listening was just so hard for you, 

even when I did it when YOU needed me to.

a full life of fair weather friends, but this hurricanes been brewing for years. 

holding back anger, faking smiles, weeping & wiping secret tears. 

being alone on most everything you have going on, keeping worry, loneliness, secrets and fears.

you stop telling your friends about the sunny days, cuz they won't be there with an *umbrella for the rain. 

I'm just so fuckin sick of being alone, time and time again. 

yes of COURSE I want the sunshine, I want the fun and the whimsey,

but I also want to feel like I can be real, be honest, without you acting like I'm crazy

just once I want to know, 

what it's like to have someone stick around

long enough to let something genuine grow, 

maybe even long enough to see the rainbow. 

* (unless you're an oregonian)

?

~Back to Poetry~

#sparklep8nter #sparklep8nterart #sparklep8nterpoem #sparklep8ntersong #longenoughtoseetherainbow #fairweatherfriends #fairweather #stormyweatherfriends #realfriends #truefriends #bestfriends #whatisarealfriend #whatisabestfriend 

Unraveling Dream Catcher

 

When the Dream Catcher meant to Catch your Nightmares,

becomes the nightmare, And in no way it spares, every bit of your Fears.

When it all starts unraveling, and all the horrors come crashing through, 

sticking in this swinging tangled web, hanging by a thread.

All I want is sweet dreams, just a few.

But all my visions ended and my heart started burning, 

my soul started yearning, 

for the little life I had left in my inner sight, 

Will they ever come back as I sleep at night??

When I close my eyes in the daytime, all I see is Darkness.

excuse my inwardness, 

it's just so hard to FOCUS

No words, No Sounds, No Pictures, no little movies on little screens rewinding and fast-forwarding. no life flashing before my eyes. 

ALL I have left to look forward to is those little visions upon waking. I've had none of those since I was in the Hospital on New Years Day.  Dreams have been forgotten faster than I've even had them, 

insomnia worse, every day since... all the inspiration went away.

Sometimes I look at photos and think to paint something I'd Love to see

I'd just love a little garden with a Flowering wall, 

while charmed by little tea lights, Something I can enjoy in the now, 

Something I'd maybe never recall as I dream at night Damn, I hope someday I regain my inner sight. 

And I didn't have my Dreamcatcher, to guarantee 

sweet slumber,  That goes to the one who took my 30s.  (What was That?)

(yeah, you heard me)

 Now I'm feeling a little bit nerdy, kinda like one of those boppin songs by Janette McCurdy

I desperately felt like I needed to dream, 

  for weeks I thought I'd make myself one,  Some feathers, some floss, something to wrap around and give it some class. 

for WEEKS...  I thought this, and then LITERALLY the one thing I needed most, became a topic in another part of the universe. 

whats that word again? Dream Catcher? WELL what did I miss?

Dream-catchers Are not the Talk of the town, I'm just sippin my green tea, unbenouwnsed to me, not long before,  I just couldn't see

 the new direction it came in to me,

because I'm the only one not supposed to KNOW... 

The Dreamcatcher Blocked me from Seeing anything at ALL...

Betrayed by the Wicked deception of the Unraveling Dream-catcher, 

I just want to Dream Again. with out that misconception and that brooding pain Because ever since lifes been a little mundane.